I hate snakes. ALL snakes. Big snakes. Little snakes. ALL snakes.

I am currently undergoing a snake crisis at this time. I have a snake (doesn’t really matter which kind because in case you didn’t catch it before…I hate snakes. ALL snakes) who has decided to move into my yard.

Why my yard? I live in the country. There is endless land for this liaison from Satan to live in. Why my yard?

So I’m trying to convince Mr. Slither to vacate the premises. He isn’t into it. So I’m searching the inter-webs for a solution to my problem. There are surprisingly few tips out there, but there are a ton of, “It’s just a snake…if it isn’t poisonous, just leave it alone” comments. Let me repeat it one more time: I hate snakes. ALL snakes. Big snakes. Little snakes. ALL snakes.

I don’t want to kill the snake…I don’t think I could handle dealing with either a chopped up version of this thing or a simple dead one. So I’m at a loss there. I could never do a glue trap because…yeah…I would still have to deal with the snake. So I am trying moth balls and cutting back on how many days I water my lawn; going to make it dry and stinky for awhile and see what happens.

Of course, if you have any ideas, please share. And before you start in with the, “it’s just a snake” bit, let me remind you: I hate snakes. ALL snakes. Big snakes. Little snakes. ALL snakes.